| 50 Ways To Disrupt School |
| Oblivion |
Most of this list is derived from an article in the August 1996 issue of The Last Word called "81 DISRUPTIVE THINGS TO DO AT SCHOOL." Permission was given to use the article. We modified, deleted, and added entries.
- Protest U.S. aid to brutal, reactionary regimes by digging a giant bomb crater in the front lawn.
- Start an information booth to give new students opinions and warnings about teachers on enrollment day.
- Food fight!
- In hallways between class, conduct massive searches for "lost" contact lenses and tell people not to walk through because "they might step on it."
- Protest animal testing by releasing the animals in the biology classroom.
- Distribute a "consumer report" on the education you’ve been receiving.
- Periodically go to the office to have some rumor confirmed or denied.
- Perform citizen’s arrests of administrators for destroying students’ minds.
- Swallow snake bite antidote (the harmless kind). Walk into the principal’s office and aim at their carpet, desk, and clothing.
- Pick up some dog training liquid at a pet store--it smells like urine.
- Ask questions that have no relevance to anything
- Remove contents of teachers’ mailboxes. Print up everything that’s confidential or interesting.
- Leave hints that "Tuesday’s the day."
- Impersonate parental voices and make irate phone calls to the office.
- Make a super stink bomb out of hydrogen sulfide and put it in the ventilation system. This could clear your school for days.
- If your school has a ceiling made up of panels, put a dead fish in the ceiling. Or put the fish in an empty locker and glue it shut.
- Put a sign on your locker that warns, "this locker will self-destruct if opened for inspection."
- Print up false notices on school letterhead and distribute them to the teachers’ mailboxes. Eventually, they’ll never know what to believe.
- Are certain teachers or principals misbehaving? Print up a rap sheet with their names and telephone numbers and distribute it. Now students can call up at any time and reprimand them.
- Get hold of a film to be shown at a school assembly and splice in parts of a movie of your choosing (mating rituals from The Discovery Channel).
- Teachers often leave grade books unguarded. Help yourself.
- Start wailing in the halls.
- Play with lighting and microphone controls during assemblies.
- Start a campaign to have the letter "Z" appear everywhere as the mark of angry students.
- Set up a fake school and hire away the lousy teachers.
- Read the school budget. Distribute a list of the stupid expenditures.
- Put alarm clocks in numerous lockers. Set them to go off every ten minutes and then close and lock the lockers.
- March around the school with a flag singing "The Star Spangled Banner." If the school tries to punish you, call your local news agencies and patriotic groups to complain that your school is run by pinkos.
- Some schools have automatic sprinkler systems that go off when sensors detect too much heat. Find the sensors and hold a match to them.
- Get the senior class to use the senior gift money for something subversive.
- Demand that all school equipment being stored rather than being used be made available to students.
- If your school won’t conduct teacher evaluations, do it yourself. Give the results to the students, faculty, school board, and community.
- Have a student lie on the ground outside. When a teacher appears, tell them the student jumped and point to the roof or third-story window. Mumble "Fred dared him" or "maybe it was LSD."
- Toss handfuls of BB’s on the floors of busy halls, assemblies, etc.
- Burn large holes in your lunch trays and turn them into the cafeteria saying, "probably the chili."
- Leave resignation letters from faculty members on the principal’s desk.
- Get a small group to carry screwdrivers and slowly dismantle the school.
- Bomb scares break up boredom during exams or on beautiful days.
- Photograph teachers and administrators constantly--even without film!
- Splice into your school’s intercom system from a remote, hidden spot. Now you have your own radio station broadcasting to the entire school!
- Take the door to the office off its hinges but leave it standing there.
- At a pep rally, wear clothing in support of the opposing team.
- Pass copies of this list out.
- Get a crowd together and scream "fight! fight!"
- Put a ticking clock in a locked briefcase and leave it in the courtyard.
- Walk around in a sheet and a crown of thorns ranting about Armageddon.
- If you have security with walkie talkies, get an identical walkie talkie.
- Roll your eyes and body back and forth and mumble wierd things.
- Act asleep. When the teacher yells or hits your desk, keep sleeping.
- Ask your Air Force Uncle to "miss" the practice target.